What if electronic television remote gets life?

In a lighter sense, it will literally whack it’s operator to death. Let us go beyond, assume an imaginary scenario; where all the electronic remotes have been generous enough to give opportunity/trial in a court of law before convicting the operator for offence of continuous harassment.

I imaginarily put down here my thoughts, what could be the arguments? First such an occurrence will give us only one option to us – seeking mercy. Is there any other way out:-

“My Remote Lord, I accept the offence but as per general law, person who causes to commit should be punished rather than person who commits it. The causes are:

1. Small snaps of serials and movies are being played in between the bigger movie the Advertisement
2. Introduction of lot of comedy channels has forced operators to play all scenes of the movie whether it contains tinge of humor or not.
3. I realize the meaning of familiarity breeds contempt only after watching television. (Yesterday evening’s show re-telecasted today morning and scheduled for tomorrow afternoon)
4. Concept of variety shows are by itself a question of doubt, it’s a variety for the viewers or performers?

There are numerous arguments to add on my lord. World is moving towards optimum utilization of time. So I have to filter out the unwanted things and optimize the viewing time for the very little interesting part that is telecasted.

There is no other alternative for me, other than to continuously swap channels to make out any interesting show/cinema/event in the television.

Of-late, the number of channels has grown like amoeba. So it’s utmost importance to the viewer to stay in tune with the recent movie channel release.

Dear lord, all these have probed me to pester you.

“Change the cause and not effect”.

All the readers can put themselves in the shoes of Remote Lord (subrogation) and give your verdict.